Love yourself

Author: Baogu Yuanye
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2006-10-01
Features: Joy in a hospital on the U.S. West Coast border city of San Diego, William Matthew, who has been living there all year due to a traumatic injury that left him completely paralyzed. When sunlight streams into the room from the south-facing window, Matthew begins to face attacks of pain from different parts of his body—the pain always arrives in the morning. During the nearly hour-long torment, Matthew cannot turn over, cannot wipe his sweat, and even cannot cry, as his tear ducts have atrophied due to the side effects of medication. The young female nurse covers her face in sympathy for the suffering Matthew endures, unable to look directly at him. Matthew says, "The excruciating pain is indeed unbearable, but I am still grateful for it—pain lets me know I am still alive." In the early years of his hospital stay, Matthew had no sensation in his body, neither comfort nor pain. Under the meticulous care of the doctors, some nerves had regenerated, sending "pain" signals to the central nervous system every morning. To discover joy in pain—this seems absurd to most people. But by being in Matthew's situation, one realizes that this specific pain not only brings him joy but also hope. Of course, a crucial prerequisite is that Matthew is a person of strong will. In the past, Matthew had experienced countless days and nights without any sensation. If pain is a broken wall, then numbness is a desolate desert. Pain allowed Matthew to experience existence, time, and the belonging of his body. In a sense, this is even a form of value—medical and rehabilitative value. Of course, Matthew is not a masochist in a pathological sense; he uses pain as an opportunity to recover and enjoy all the sensations that a normal person experiences. No one can guarantee that the unfortunate Matthew will ever achieve this, but he and his doctors are working toward this goal, so he eagerly awaits the arrival of pain the next morning. Matthew's story shocks us; at the very least, it makes us realize that we are too wasteful of what we possess. Joy is not limited to food and sex. It can even be hidden within a piercing pain. Pain points to life—so isn’t life a form of joy? Clearly, our usual standards for happiness are too strict and narrow, to the point where we often fail to experience it. In terms of sensory enjoyment, people emphasize the role of external factors, such as money. This way of thinking is not without merit, but it is also somewhat intolerant, hindering us from experiencing a complete life. Is there no meaning to life beyond pleasure and money? Why not establish a life that is within easy reach and can be fully enjoyed? Beyond pleasure and money, it also includes faith, tranquility, discovery, giving, leisure, and other simple joys—expanding the boundaries of joy to make oneself often happy. Matthew's joy is actually a joy of discovery, though it still requires the price of endurance. The meaning of possession is broader—besides material factors, it includes healthy limbs, free thoughts, fresh air, observation, listening, and reading. Behind these familiar states lies, in fact, the support of a strong and balanced mind and body. Without pain, this balance is proven to be precious. Matthew tells us that happiness is never a single thing. You cannot imagine a life without discomfort, filled only with pleasure. Not only candy can bring joy to people.