New Dialogue on Psychological Confusions of Middle School Students

Author: Zhang Huai Chun, Lu Xiang Zhi / Country: Mainland China
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2006-06-01
Features:
After the "generation gap" emerges, adolescence becomes a transitional period from adolescence to adulthood. The strong sense of adulthood and independence makes teenagers believe they have grown up and are confident in handling everything in life. This independence initially manifests in showing off their physical and intellectual abilities, and later in resisting adult rights and opposing being classified as children. They develop a sense of resentment toward excessive care from adults and yearn for the rights and status of adults. Additionally, due to differences in historical conditions and living environments between two generations, disagreements often arise in their views on many issues. Eventually, some may develop severe rebellion, no longer valuing adult perspectives and instead perceiving adults as conservative, petty, and overly anxious. This creates conflicts with parents' excessive supervision, leading to mutual unhappiness, estrangement, and the formation of a "generation gap." The best way to bridge the "generation gap" is through understanding. Understanding is mutual—it requires parents to understand their children: understanding their learning goals, recognizing that breaks are necessary for more effective study, acknowledging that friendship brings joy, and appreciating the importance of balancing work and rest. Children should also understand their parents: recognizing their eagerness for their children to succeed and understanding their well-intentioned efforts to improve their competitiveness. Therefore, it is essential to spend time with parents and have sincere conversations with them, gently expressing your true feelings. Perhaps this will lead parents to adjust their parenting methods, and you will no longer feel overwhelmed. Do not consider talking to parents as an "immature" behavior; effective communication is a sign of maturity and independence. In these exchanges, parents might even be influenced by you and adopt new things that young people appreciate, unintentionally narrowing the generation gap.
Additionally, it is important to demonstrate a certain level of independence to put your parents at ease. If you have grown up with everything provided—clothes handed to you, meals served, even handkerchiefs unwashed, and always being picked up from school—suddenly locking yourself in your room after school or coming home very late at night would naturally cause your parents to worry. This is not because they don't want to trust you but because your behavior makes them unable to do so. Try to show concern for your parents, help with household chores, and share your dreams and frustrations. When parents feel, "Our child is growing up," they will naturally interfere less in your actions.
P11-12