History's sky

Author: Xu Guixiang / Country: Mainland China
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2006-04-01
Features: As they went further, he was so hungry that his heart ached and his legs grew weak. At this critical juncture, Zhu Yidao finally regretted it. When escaping from Lanqiao Town, he really shouldn’t have listened to Chen Mohan’s persuasion to run to Wātū Mountain to find what he called an "egg-hunting team." If he had known he would suffer this death sentence, he would have been better off running with the villagers to the east bank of the river. Liang Daya said, "Still want to hear a story?" Zhu Yidao said, "Can it feed me?" Liang Daya smiled and said, "It won’t fill you up, but it can quench your thirst." So he cleared his throat, opened his mouth to tell the story, but then stopped, thinking for a moment before asking, "Where were we last time?" Zhu Yidao frowned and thought for a moment, saying, "I think it was about the daughter-in-law seeing her father-in-law draw a longevity peach with his buttocks."
"Oh, right," Liang Daya mumbled and resumed the story with relish— "This time, the daughter-in-law was delighted, thinking she had learned the family secret and mastered the art of drawing longevity peaches. When she got back to her room, she poured ink and water into the foot basin, then imitated her father-in-law’s posture, took off her pants, and soaked her buttocks. After soaking for about half an hour, she moved to the mat and sat on the Xuan paper, leaving behind a buttock print. Hehe, surprisingly, it looked quite similar. The next day, the daughter-in-law proudly took her drawing to the street to sell, but no one bought it even after selling all afternoon. Some people came to look at her painting, smiled, and then left. The daughter-in-law couldn’t figure it out. It was the same kind of product, yet her father-in-law’s paintings were snapped up, but no one wanted hers? Compared to her father-in-law, her buttocks were tender, white, and firm, leaving behind a plump and round longevity peach. Why couldn’t hers sell? So she intercepted people to ask. At first, they refused to speak, but when pressed, they said, 'Ma’am, your longevity peach is well drawn, but there are two flaws. First, it’s too fat, greasy, and unpleasant. Second, it’s missing something. Look at your father-in-law’s painting—the longevity peach has a stem in the middle, but yours doesn’t.'"
Zhu Yidao didn’t understand and asked drowsily, "How come the daughter-in-law’s painting doesn’t have a stem?" Liang Daya glanced back at Zhu Yidao and said, "You’re such a fool. Think about it—she’s a woman, and she’s missing something between her legs. How could she sit and leave behind a stem?" Zhu Yidao finally realized what was going on and thought for a moment before scratching his head and asking, "Who were that old gentleman and his daughter-in-law? I’ve never heard of such a family in Lanqiao Town." Liang Daya snorted and chuckled oddly, saying, "They were Chen Mohan’s grandfather and Chen Mo, his grandmother." At first, Zhu Yidao believed it, but after thinking for a moment with his teeth gritted, he still felt something was off. He said, "Not like that. Chen Mohan’s grandfather was a scholar, not an artist. Chen Mohan’s grandmother was the daughter of the county magistrate, and she didn’t paint either. This story must be fake." Liang Daya snorted and said with a smirk, "That bastard Chen Mohan doesn’t follow the same path as me, so I’ll make up a story to humiliate his grandfather and grandmother." P25-26