Cultivating children's social skills

Author: (American) Mike Yi et al.
Translator: Fu Yanxia
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2002-02-01
Features: Many teachers and parents complain that today's children lack civility and etiquette: arguing with parents, fooling around with classmates in hallways, and being extremely rude to teachers. These issues are a major headache for parents, who hope their children will learn to respect others as they grow into adults, but they don't know how to teach them to be civil and polite. Some parents believe in teaching their children this way: "Do what I say, no discussion, and don't dare to argue!" We say this might have worked 50 years ago, but it doesn't anymore. Other parents think that if they don't have high expectations or demands for their children, the children will respect them. The consequence of this idea is that they spoil their children and let them run wild. Clearly, both methods are unacceptable. True respect should be a comprehensive quality that includes care, politeness, understanding, and cooperation, and most importantly, respect must be mutual. Many parents are often unaware of this issue: to teach children to respect others, the children themselves must be respected first. Because many parents don't fully understand what "respect" truly means, many of their parenting methods inadvertently set a bad example of "disrespect." The purpose of this book is to discuss how to show respect to children so that they can learn to respect others. This point is emphasized particularly because mutual respect is the foundation of good interpersonal relationships, which will benefit children throughout their lives. Additionally, this book will teach parents how to help their children develop civilized and polite habits. Behavior, politeness, and etiquette skills are considered "lost arts" for today's children and even adults, so it is especially necessary to emphasize them. Finally, we will discuss the extremely extreme rude behavior—violence—in society and teach parents how to ensure their children's safety and how to prevent their children from using violence. This book is divided into three parts. Part "Civil Parents—Civil Children," you will learn some parenting techniques for respecting children, as well as how to teach children to respect others, how to encourage them, how to communicate with them, and how to manage family anger. The second part, "Polite Children Learn Social Skills," will tell you how to educate children with respectful behavior norms, teach them survival skills, and help them develop civilized and polite habits. The third part, "Combating Extreme Rude Behavior—Violence," will teach you how to deal with the influence of violence in society and how you and your children can handle violent situations they may encounter. We promise that you will learn many parenting methods and techniques from this book, but don't expect to directly jump from the book to perfect behavior practice—this is impossible. You must practice these techniques over a long period to become proficient. Good parenting is a very demanding job, and it's important to realize that simply using these techniques won't automatically make your child cooperate positively and politely. They also need time to adjust to your new methods. Of course, with patience and perseverance, you will gradually build a more harmonious and close relationship with your child.