Etiquette Manual - A Guide to Actions for a Well-Mannered Person

Author: (American) John, translated by Gu Daqi
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2004-03-01
Features: It is often said that good behavior is an achievement, but I would argue that good behavior is a responsibility. So, what is good behavior? In my view, good behavior is that which is considered acceptable in social discourse, excluding roughness and rudeness, and minimizing any actions that could lead to barbarism or vulgarity. Many people think that good behavior is effeminate, believing that being carefree and unconcerned is more masculine than good behavior. However, living in crowded communities, how we coexist is far from a trivial matter. It involves reducing friction, enhancing communication, ensuring that every aspect of one's life contributes to the well-being and satisfaction of others, suppressing annoying arrogance, eliminating collisions caused by selfishness in interactions, and navigating among people with diverse and conflicting motivations without causing clashes—all of these are functions of good behavior. When parents, guardians, and teachers inspire teenagers to develop a desire for good social behavior, they must not assume that such behavior is merely acceptable or unacceptable, or that following etiquette rules is optional. Everyone has a responsibility to adhere to etiquette. Etiquette is an expression of friendliness and kindness; it not only enhances the beauty of those with a good heart but also increases the happiness of those around them. Etiquette is a strict responsibility and should therefore be a part of rigorous training. In society, many people scoff at what is called etiquette. Sometimes, certain aspects of etiquette may seem trivial, but overall, there is every reason to categorize all such habits under the umbrella of etiquette. We have reason to believe that etiquette facilitates communication, avoids offending others, and brings comfort and joy. No one can violate these unwritten etiquette customs if they wish to be a gentleman.