Solid Step 13

Author: Tina Tsyrenina (USA)
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2005-07-01
Features: Why Leave the "Twelve Steps" Organization?
Regardless of which recovery organization you belong to, its goal is to free patients from a destructive, uncontrollable "addiction." Instead, it replaces it with an addiction to the recovery program and dependence on the treatment organization. This indicates that you haven't fully recovered because you cannot face life independently. Due to a lack of self-awareness, you develop new confusion and unease toward the organization. You desire complete recovery and true autonomy over your life, which brings you peace. Autonomy means the ability to self-control and self-arrange your surroundings. To others, it may seem aloof, but it reflects the power you give yourself—it is not aloofness but a source of emotional warmth. Only when an autonomous person feels they can settle themselves can they love others and accept love in return. Some content in this book will teach you how to cultivate this fundamental skill, a skill essential for building intimate relationships with others and with yourself. This book provides recovery information beyond the "Twelve Steps" program, teaching you how to take control of your life and take measures to prevent falling back into the past—dependency, addiction, and uncontrollability.
The "Twelve Steps" recovery program is like a tourniquet—it can stop the bleeding and save your life, but the wound needs healing, something the "Twelve Steps" cannot do. If you don't take further steps to heal the wound, you will remain in a state of recovery as described by the "Twelve Steps," rather than being truly cured. Your "addiction" is in the "Twelve Steps" program because of a transfer. It starts with trust in sponsors, then shifts to dependence on the "treatment program," and becomes obsessed with regular meetings. This process transfers the addiction. The implementation of the "Twelve Steps" program is highly attractive to patients, far exceeding the original addiction. The organization schedules your time and uses various activities to distract you, thereby helping you quit the harmful addiction while creating dependence on the recovery organization, which also prevents you from fully recovering.
When you first join a recovery organization, you may leave your old friends, colleagues, or an unhealthy family, as they have a negative influence on you. In AA, you find a new territory to make friends, which may satisfy you. But gradually, you realize that these friends are just like you—they also suffer from "addiction" due to abnormal emotional issues. When you achieve progress in your recovery, you may develop a desire to surpass the addiction—those who share joys with you (e.g., listening to music, exercising, painting, discussing politics, or reading). However, if you believe that regular participation in organizational activities is necessary to maintain recovery, you will have no time to make friends outside the organization. If your family didn't guide you correctly, you may struggle to discover how to