78 Heart-Touching Speaking Techniques

Author: Gao Ying
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2006-09-01
Features: Actively cooperate, maintain the other person's interest, and only then can communication proceed smoothly and pleasantly. The following tips are very effective.
1. Be good at psychological reassurance
During a conversation, we should actively cooperate to show that the topic is interesting to us and to imply that we are paying attention. We can also follow up on their topic, encourage them to continue with a positive listening attitude and composed demeanor, or offer them a cup of tea. At the right time, we can express agreement: "I think so too," "That's indeed the case," or "Your perspective is exactly the same as mine." This psychological reassurance suggests active cooperation, encouraging the other person to pour out their feelings.
2. Actively encourage the other person
When conversing with someone, we should display an interested, caring, and supportive attitude to make the other person feel strongly acknowledged. At this point, your main goal is to encourage them to speak more. If they ask for your opinion, don’t interrupt their train of thought just because you want to chime in. Of course, you can repeat their statements on minor points to show attention, affirmation, and reinforcement of their feelings. For example, "Yes, only when one is in such a situation can they truly understand the other person's difficulties." Such repetition provides important psychological support and helps to keep the conversation lively. At the same time, it may serve as a cue for the other person to express their thoughts more clearly, such as by helping to summarize or providing an appropriate description, thereby maintaining their enthusiasm for the conversation. If you want the other person to open up further, it is essential to offer sympathy, understanding, and a sense of resonance. Let them know that you are considering their situation from their perspective. You can often say, "I also feel the same way about what you mentioned," or "Although I don’t agree, I do think you’ve explained the point clearly." This helps strengthen common ground between the two of you and promotes mutual understanding and communication.
3. Express your own views sincerely
When conversing with someone, if you agree with every word the other person says without ever saying "no" or sharing your own honest opinions, just echoing others’ views, you will be seen as someone without a mind of your own or as a slippery person. Others won’t be willing to be friends with you either. In daily life, as long as we politely express our differing opinions to others, it won’t offend them but may even be well-received, letting them know that you are seriously considering the issue they raised. Because many of the things discussed in daily life don’t have absolute standards of right or wrong, as long as we sincerely express our views, we might just analyze the problem from another angle. Generally, the other person will accept this with understanding, refining their own ideas.
4. Pay attention to shifting the topic at the right time
Even the best topics eventually run their course. When the other person’s interest wanes and they just repeat unoriginal content, it’s time to change the subject. There are many ways to shift the topic. For example, you can stop discussing the old topic, pause for a moment, let someone else speak, and then introduce a new topic from there. Alternatively, you can wait for a pause in the conversation and then bring up a new topic.