"Enter key return does not need to be translated, return as it is, all other Chinese should be translated into English: Parental expectation syndrome: Are you pushing your child too hard?

Author: (USA) Evan Rosenfeld, Nicole Wise | Translator/Country: Mainland China
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2005-08-01
Features: From the time the child is not yet born, we have overdone it. In modern society, there are countless things to consider when establishing a family! We are solely focused on ensuring the little one is born healthy and do everything in our power to achieve this goal. Therefore, at least three months before trying to conceive, these overly eager expectant mothers begin to exercise and adjust their bodies to the ideal state for pregnancy. Even couples with no reason to suspect infertility feel it necessary to start recording their basal body temperature every month. To ensure the eggs are in the best condition before fertilization, expectant mothers consume large amounts of vitamins and minerals, avoid any food containing chemicals, and follow the healthy and gentle exercise and wellness methods recommended in books. Just for pregnancy, there is so much to prepare! The attitude we adopt when starting something often guides the entire process, and this is true for many things. If parents who have had vasectomies and raised their children have looked back, they would definitely realize how much the first step affects the outcome. From the time the child is not yet born, we have overdone it, only to ensure everything goes perfectly during the upbringing process. From our thoughts when preparing to conceive, we can predict our current level of anxiety and our desire for our child to succeed (or at least have this tendency), which is the theme we will explore in this chapter. Many problems stem from our deep belief that we can plan every aspect of the future, including our children. When considering when to start preparing for pregnancy, we already take into account our careers, life goals, and financial situation, aiming for the perfect timing. Even before the sperm and egg have combined, we begin to worry about community and school issues. To ensure the child has a healthy body, we completely change our dietary habits, forcing ourselves to drink at least three large glasses of milk daily—even if we hate it—and swallowing several high-dose vitamin pills. Just a few months into pregnancy, even before putting on maternity clothes, we start drafting birth plans, choosing delivery methods, and even considering details like whether or not to use anesthesia. Of course, parents should have a sense of responsibility and long-term vision, but when we work so hard to make everything perfect and plan the future of the new family in every detail, we forget how magical the arrival of a new life truly is! Becoming a parent may be more nerve-wracking than getting married or buying a house. Bringing a completely dependent new life into this world is one of the biggest responsibilities in life. If something goes wrong, who else can we blame but ourselves? The smart, highly educated us absolutely refuse to make the slightest mistake in our role as parents, and we believe we must stay vigilant from the very beginning. We prepare very seriously, emphasizing rationality and science. We read extensively about pregnancy and childbirth in books and newspapers, carefully tracing our and our partner’s family health histories: “How is your health? How is your parents’ health? How is your grandparents’ health? Are there any genetic diseases that require prenatal screening?” We then turn to more personal questions: “Do you drink more than 1.4 ounces of alcohol on average per day? Do you smoke? Are there harmful substances in your living environment or workplace? Did you ever put lead-containing toys in your mouth as a child? Perhaps you’ve been hiding it for a long time—did you ever take banned drugs when you were young?” Do you feel like you’re going crazy? Maybe, if you look at these behaviors themselves or if you disapprove of this generation of parents. However, our intentions are pure, and our attitudes and behaviors are understandable. Expectant parents will do anything to have a healthy child and a happy family life. A responsible adult cannot completely ignore these important issues, at least, we don’t know anyone who does. From the perspective of modern parents, especially those who feel their parents didn’t care enough about them, it’s hard to understand how this enthusiasm can create obstacles. But these obstacles will inevitably arise. P23-25