Wit and strategy classic

Author: Kai Jie
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2006-06-01
Features: Throughout history, wisdom and strategy have been applied in various aspects of life, including politics, business, social interactions, friendships, personnel management, and even romantic relationships. In today's society, wisdom is everywhere, omnipresent, and ever-present. Whoever uses it skillfully and appropriately becomes the master of the current era and the ultimate victor in the tide of competition. Do you also want to become someone who can change your destiny and take control of your own fate? This book is written for all those who refuse to be ordinary, yearn for a better life, and aspire to success. From personal conduct, social interactions, workplace dynamics, business warfare, communication, and interpersonal skills to profound life philosophies and even small gestures like greetings, it teaches you the wisdom of navigating life in an easy-to-understand manner, providing you with various philosophies and strategies for dealing with people, situations, and environments.
Steps to Re-evaluate Yourself
All human behavior is driven by the pursuit of certain goals. For example, if you smoke, it's not that you willingly inhale tar into your lungs, but rather that the act helps you relax and feel comfortable, so you develop the habit. Understanding this principle will help you realize why some re-evaluations may not be effective, as the satisfaction and motivation they provide are not as strong as those offered by habitual behavior. If the benefits of a new behavior are not as good as those of the old one, you will soon revert to the old behavior.
There was a woman who had been blind for eight years. However, she later discovered that she was only partially sighted. Why did she choose to pretend to be blind? The reason was that eight years ago, she was involved in a car accident that damaged her vision. Since then, her family and friends all believed she was blind and would go out of their way to help her with everything. They gave her an unprecedented amount of love and care, which made her content to pretend to be blind, even sometimes convincing herself that she really was. This was because she couldn't find a better way to receive the care she craved. In reality, if she had found an effective way of living, she would not have had to pretend to be blind and could have lived a vibrant life.
By using the method of re-evaluation or re-framing, you can establish new behaviors. Once you find alternative actions to replace old habits, estimate whether you can maintain these new behaviors in the future. If you believe you can and if these new behaviors truly provide the same level of satisfaction as the old ones, then you should start restraining your old habits and firmly adopt the new ones. Below are six steps to re-evaluate yourself, which can help you give up old behaviors, adopt new ones, and retain the benefits of the old ones:
(1) Identify the specific behavior or action you want to change.
(2) Strengthen your determination to change by using self-questioning or visualization to boost your confidence.
(3) Confirm the benefits the old behavior provides and write them down.
(4) List one or more new behaviors that can offer better or at least equal benefits to the old one.
(5) Confirm the new behavior you will adopt, comparing the benefits and feasibility of the new behavior versus the old one or between different new behaviors.
(6) Implement the new behavior.
Re-evaluation can almost eliminate negative feelings about anything. By using the six steps of re-evaluation or re-framing, ask yourself or visualize the troubles you face, think about where they are actually quite humorous; then consider what benefits might come from changing your approach, and determine the feasibility and your commitment to the new way. You can practice this method with the things that bother you, and soon you'll find that your distress over the matter decreases significantly.
The same approach can also be used to treat phobias, but it may require more effort. Since phobias are often deeply rooted in your subconscious, to effectively re-evaluate them, you need to keep a distance from your fear, which requires the help of imagination. For example, if you have a particular phobia, try visualization. First, recall past experiences that made you feel fearful.