Patient's question:
My wife has been pregnant for four years since she found out. She didn't have any sexual relations until after the baby was over a year old. Otherwise, she refused every time. Even when we did, it was only once or twice a month, and she wouldn't let me lightly touch her, fearing tickling and hygiene issues. She also refused to change positions and kept urging me to hurry up. Honestly, it was just pointless, like being with a piece of wood. She wouldn't let me hold or kiss her, and I felt like I was offering romance and love, but she believed it was disgusting and shameful, shameless. We sleep separately at night, not close to each other, because she said it made her uncomfortable. She always had various excuses, and I tried talking to her many times, even causing conflicts, but she wouldn't respond. Even when I suggested seeing a doctor, she refused and got angry. Now, I can't take it anymore, and we're sleeping separately. Is this a physical or psychological condition? Please advise.Doctor's answer:
From the situation you described, it is very likely that your wife's condition is triggered by psychological factors. She is reluctant to share a bed with you and finds various excuses to refuse sexual activity. She doesn't want to be touched lightly, fears uncleanliness, is unwilling to change positions, and keeps urging you to speed things up and finish quickly. She usually doesn't allow hugs or kisses, considers romance to be shameful and vulgar, which could be because she has suffered from psychological and emotional trauma in the past, leaving her with deep psychological shadows. This kind of psychological trauma is often related to childhood experiences, such as being raped as a child or witnessing her parents' sexual activity being criticized, which made her feel that sex is a sin and something dirty. In her case, she needs understanding psychological therapy.