My youth, my recklessness

Author: Ren Zengchao
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2005-01-01
Features: Hilarious youth with endless Beijing flavor.
· Birth left parents utterly bewildered;
· Early romance caused chaos at home;
· Cheating turned brothers into man-eaters.
Once, my fried chicken leg was snatched by Wolf Qing'er (an immature wolf dog) raised by Qiangzi’s dad, making me cry uncontrollably. After Zhang Xue learned the story, she watched that dog all afternoon. And successfully stole the chicken bone back under its watchful eyes. Then she asked me kindly, “Still want to eat?”
Looking at that bone, I cried even harder.
My mom locked the door while my dad was drunk and beat me with a clothes-hanging rod. I’m not stupid, though. I dodged and asked her, “Why did you lock the door?”
“Scared you’d run!”
“Then you can chase me!”
“Still talking nonsense? If you could catch me, I’d still run!”
“How can you be so stupid? You were just one step away!”
“You’re trying to sleep again? Go die, you’ll have plenty of time to sleep then!”
“To reiterate, the Treaty of Shimonoseki was signed by Li Hongzhang, not Li Hongzhi.”
Sometimes, when she encountered functions she couldn’t solve, she’d ask me in a unique way: “You, come here. How do you solve this problem? If this question affects my college entrance exam score, you’ll support me for life!”
The story has nothing to do with my life. Proof is that the protagonist in the novel is an excellent basketball player who can dunk. My height is only 5’8.5”, and even after a 10-meter run-up, I can barely touch the rim. The reason I could describe the game so vividly is thanks to Yao Ming. Ever since he entered the NBA, I started watching basketball. I even tried playing in games, but ah, that’s a story for another day. As a movie line goes: “In theory, I might be invincible. In practice, I’m completely powerless.”
Most of the plot is set in summer because I love summer, especially its dazzling and glaring sunlight. Due to my personality, the novel doesn’t focus much on the,, of youth, even when it does, it’s handled with humor. I don’t expect it to provoke deep thought—novels are fictional after all. Being tormented by fictional stories is absurd. Life is multifaceted; endlessly suffering in anger and confusion is like tying a noose around your own neck.