I don't understand.

Author: Sun Rui
Publisher:
Publish Date: 2004-08-01
Features: The story revolves around the work and love of four young people with vastly different personalities, depicting the hardships of university graduates as they enter society, the huge gap between ideals and reality, the anger of independent thinking when facing the secular world, and the boundless yearning for beautiful love that they cannot grasp. They are idle, drinking, chasing women, wandering in society, and yearning for work, yet unwilling to submit to the rigid and dogmatic nature of jobs. They keep holding onto fantasies about the future, yet are repeatedly knocked to the ground by the harsh reality of society. They love life, questioning where tomorrow lies, yet cannot find the answer. They are a lost generation.
The protagonist Ni Meng becomes increasingly confused about the future and life as he frequently changes jobs. At the same time, faced with his first love and a current girlfriend, he becomes increasingly unsure about love. Ni Meng stumbles through life in confusion, unsure of what to do.
This book follows the humorous and witty writing style of Grassland Years, vividly describing the drifting life and state of confusion after graduation. Amidst the satire, it raises questions about what constitutes a truly meaningful life.
"Everyone lives their own way. I don’t bother comparing myself to others. As long as I live for myself, it’s better than anything else. Am I waiting for something? A stroke of luck? Love? A job? No, I don’t know what I’m waiting for, just like I don’t know what is waiting for me."
After Grassland Years, Living in Confusion directly probes the rebellious yet tender, hard yet fragile inner world of the "lost generation."
A year after graduation, I still have nothing but pain, confusion, a belly full of complaints, and a sliver of hope for life. This kind of life has already bored me, but any life is one’s own choice. Once you choose, you can’t regret it, even if it means destroying yourself. I switched my monthly pass from the city’s academic institutions to the city’s industrial sector, hoping life would change. I returned to school and found that all the small eateries nearby had been demolished. While feeling sorry for the current students, I also decided to "demolish and wash" myself.
"Everyone lives their own way. I don’t bother comparing myself to others. As long as I live for myself, it’s better than anything else. Am I waiting for something? A stroke of luck? Love? A job? No, no. I don’t know what I’m waiting for, just like I don’t know what is waiting for me."